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看动漫学心理学 让内向者为难的12件事

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Twelve things introverts might find difficult by Samantha Chavez.
Samantha Chavez:让内向者为难的12件事。
As introverts, we sometimes find mundane tasks more challenging than your average extroverts.
作为内向的人,我们有时会发现简单的日常任务更具挑战性。
While introvert's experiences might be similar, we all differ in the way that we deal with them.
虽然内向者的经历或许很相似,我们应对它们的方式却不相同。
Here are 12 things that an introvert might find difficult.
以下是12件让内向者为难的事情。
1. Being told not to be shy.
1. 被告知不要害羞。
Throughout our life, us introverts will often hear people tell us to "stop being shy". That results in associating shyness with weakness
一生中内向者常会听到别人说“不要害羞”。这是因为他们将害羞和脆弱联系在了一起。
People tend to confuse the two, even though there's nothing wrong with shyness.
人们常将这两个弄混淆,虽然害羞并无过错。
Discovering introversion helps us rationalize how we feel, making it easier for us to move around in social situations.
发现内向性能帮助我们将自己的感受理性化,使我们能更容易融入社交场合。
Still, most introverts will avoid explaining their introversion to someone they've just met in hopes of stopping the "Don't be shy" comments, altogether.
大部分内向者还是会避免跟刚认识的人解释自己很内向,因为不希望别人说‘不要害羞’。
2. Writing formal emails.
2. 写正式邮件。
This can be a prime source of anxiety for introverts.
这是内向者焦虑的主要来源。
There will be at least 3 sessions of drafting, revising, and editing alone before they feel comfortable enough to press send.
在舒适地按下发送键前,至少会进行三轮检验:草稿、修改和编辑。
And even then, we are not safe from No. 3. Overthinking Little Things
即使是这样内向者还是没有安全感,这是由于第三点:对于小事情想太多。
This translates mostly to face-to-face interactions,
写邮件基本上都会被转换为面对面互动,
as we have little to no time to prepare for what we are going to say, we fear that we will make a mistake, or spill something that we shouldn't.
因为准备的时间很少,我们害怕自己会出错或是把事情搞砸。
Furthermore, a single phrase during a conversation can plague our minds for the rest of the day. Even if the other person didn't think much of it.
更重要的是对话中的一个小句子都能够折磨我们半天。即使对方并没有想太多。
Not to mention No. 4. Reasoning doesn't make it better.
更别提第四点了:推论并不能让事情变好。
This goes along with face-to-face interactions. It's a very distressing experience for introverts. Even if it seems minor.
这与面对面互动相关。对内向者而言,这可以说是非常恼人了。即使是看似微小的事情。
Sometimes, we're even aware how minor it is, and that the other person has probably forgotten about it already.
有时我们甚至已经意识到了事情是多么的微小,对方甚至都已经忘记了。
This doesn't stop the dark cloud looming above us, telling us we did wrong, though.
而这一切都还是无法阻止黑云的笼罩并一直提醒我们,我们做错了。
5. The idea of social engagements.
5. 社交活动的想法。
'There is going to be a big gathering!' are words that an introvert dreads to hear. We need time to prepare mentally.
‘有一个大聚会!’这些话是内向者害怕听到的。我们需要时间进行心理准备。
For this reason, it's important for us to be informed of the time and place of the party, as well as the number of people that are attending.
因此,告诉我们聚会的时间和地点以及参加人数非常重要。
Make it the least vague possible, and you'll be sure to lessen an introvert's anxiety.
回答至少尽可能清楚,这样才能降低内向者的焦虑。
6.Cancelled plans
6. 被取消的计划
让内向者为难的12件事Trust us when we say that we have already accepted the fact that we were going to attend a social gathering.
相信我们所说的我们已经接受了要去参与社交聚会的事实。
We can't help the anxiety we feel the days prior to it, though. Hearing about cancelled plans is an introvert's joy, since it's relieving the lead-up anxiety.
聚会前几天我们都无法抑制地会焦虑。但聚会被取消是内向者的欢乐,因为这样能够消除由社交聚会所导致的焦虑。
7. Navigating social events.
7. 操控社交活动。
Sometimes, we aren't so lucky as to have plans cancelled.
有时,我们没有幸运的听到计划被取消。
And upon arriving to a social event, we'll do our best to get the greetings over with,
一旦参加社交活动,我们会尽力寒暄,
so we can find a secluded corner in which we can spend time observing, rather than participating.
这样我们才能找到一处隐秘的角落,方便观察而不是参与。
It doesn't mean we're alone, though. It means we want to stay with people we trust, won't force us out of our comfort zone.
这并意味着我们很孤独。这意味着我们想和自己信任的人待在一起,而不会强迫自己离开舒适区。
8. Sadly it doesn't always work out
8. 遗憾的是,这常常无法实现
Maybe, we don't find the people we're most comfortable with at the event
或许活动中没有我们觉得相处舒适的人
and any attempt at conversation results in us getting pushed further aside, if we fail.
任何试图参与交谈的行为,一旦交谈失败,到会导致我们逃地更远。
This can take a toll on introverts, and exhaust them within seconds.
这样会对内向者产生负面影响,会马上让他们精疲力竭。
This leads us to No.9 Attempting and failing at conversations.
这就导致了第九点:交谈中的尝试和失败。
When we are discouraged from speaking because we tried, and weren't heard,
当我们从交谈中失败而归,
we'll often end up blaming ourselves for even trying.
我们最终都会责怪自己不应该尝试。
10. Bad days.
10. 糟糕的日子。
On particularly bad days, it's hard for an introvert to find motivation to speak to ANYONE.
在特别糟糕的日子里,内向者对任何交谈都提不起兴趣。
This might be difficult to understand, and often cause friction with an introvert and their friends.
这一点或许很难理解,通常还会导致和朋友间的摩擦。
11. Restlessness and self-disgust
11. 坐立不安和自我厌恶
During our bad days, we look for ways to channel our dissatisfaction with ourselves, either by cleaning or being creative.
糟糕的日子里,我们寻找引导自己走出不安的方法,要么是清洁或创造。
We don't really want to talk to anyone yet, but we still need a sign of reassurance. We simply look to distract ourselves.
我们并不是真的不想和任何人讲话,只是我们仍然需要一种安心的迹象。我们只是转移注意力而已。
12. Being told to act "normal".
12. 被告知要表现得‘正常’一点。
Althought introverts prefer to listen instead of participate in conversations, it's common for their silence to draw attention.
虽然内向的人在交谈中更喜欢倾听而不是参与,他们会安静的关注。
And more often then not, it tends to be of the negative time.
这通常具有负面时间的性质。
This can lead to unwanted comments telling us to "act normal". Thus, making us more exhausted.
会导致一些有害的评价:‘表现得‘正常’一点。而这会让我们精疲力竭。
While introverts might share certain experiences, they all affect us differently. What are some things that you find difficult as an introvert?
虽然内向者的经历有相似之处,但它们对我们的影响全然不同。作为内向者,你觉得什么是最难的呢?
重点单词   查看全部解释    
dissatisfaction [.dissætis'fækʃən]
想一想再看
n. 不满
联想记忆
social ['səuʃəl]
想一想再看
adj. 社会的,社交的
n. 社交聚会
 
distract [di'strækt]
想一想再看
vt. 转移,分心
联想记忆
comfort ['kʌmfət]
想一想再看
n. 舒适,安逸,安慰,慰藉
vt. 安慰,使
联想记忆
conversation [.kɔnvə'seiʃən]
想一想再看
n. 会话,谈话
联想记忆
tend [tend]
想一想再看
v. 趋向,易于,照料,护理
 
prior ['praiə]
想一想再看
adj. 优先的,更重要的,在前的
adv.
 
restlessness ['restlisnis]
想一想再看
n. 坐立不安;不安定
 
distressing [dis'tresiŋ]
想一想再看
adj. 使人痛苦的,令人烦恼的 动词词distress
 
participate [pɑ:'tisipeit]
想一想再看
vt. 分享
vi. 参加,参与
联想记忆
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